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I think it's funny that my tagline for this site is "adventures in fangirl (and not very adventurous)" because it's also been almost 4 years since I last posted anything here. I'm just not much of a longform sort of social media girlie I guess. But it's also the last day or so of browsing period for Fandom Trumps Hate 2025, and I just made the promos for that last night. And I'm on board now as timer and encoder to a GL show (that I got hooked up with here on dreamwidth!). And I have been journaling, theoretically, since the start of the year. (Almost three months, if you count my several weeks of not journaling at all.)
So I guess I have some updates is what I'm trying to say. Some things to lay down and catch this journal up on. I mean, why not.
The most timely thing is what I said already, that I put up two offerings for FTH 2025, and they're both for podfic. I did offer one fanart piece last year and felt bad about it and procrastinated so hard that I just...figured I would not offer fanart for a bit. It's been really hard to make myself sit down and find time to do art.
And here, have a tumblr promo link and bluesky promo link.
Other fannish things I've been up to here and there:
The other day, Anarfea DMed me on my personal instagram (I have a fandom one I'm on a lot more) because she had a dream about me and she wanted to know how I was, if I was going to 221b con. That's the plan, and so far this year was still meant to be the last one. We're all hoping it's not, and hoping something else will fill its void if it does go under. It's only a few weeks away, and the plane disasters as of late have been making me wary about traveling. It feels selfish to want to go. But I think I've treated a lot of fandom community things in the last couple years as important to go, because we don't know when we'll be able to go again. Will that comfort my kids if I die in a plane crash though? I doubt it.
My thoughts are all over the place, I suppose. Just in general. I think anyone reading this will be unsurprised to learn that my weekly therapy sessions are like this, slippery and wandering. Most recently, there's been a lot of sleep deprivation involved. A sleep schedule that's so properly fucked that I'm awake at 5 and 6am most days. And this past weekend I still had to be up at 8 or 9 or 10am. I've not been sleeping for longer than 3-4 hour stretches for several days now. It's hard to tell what's ADHD from the inside-out and what's sleep deprivation from the outside-in, making me only about half as functional as I could be. My memory is pretty shot, and I can't tell if that's mommy brain or not, but I seem to recall having a poor memory from before I had the kids. It's not easy to tease apart any of it, it's all just sort of. Soup.
Even before the inauguration, I was having a really terrible 2025. The month of January lasted approximately seven years. I had the flu (the whole family did, in phases), I had a terrible incident with a completely off-his-face drunk Marc, I had jury duty while I had the flu, and got a $95 ticket that I still haven't paid for parking in a truck loading zone. But originally. Originally, at the end of December / early January, I had this idea that I wanted to do some things for myself. On something of a schedule even. Something as close to a new year's resolution as I've ever made, as I'm terrible with those.
So I guess I have some updates is what I'm trying to say. Some things to lay down and catch this journal up on. I mean, why not.
The most timely thing is what I said already, that I put up two offerings for FTH 2025, and they're both for podfic. I did offer one fanart piece last year and felt bad about it and procrastinated so hard that I just...figured I would not offer fanart for a bit. It's been really hard to make myself sit down and find time to do art.
And here, have a tumblr promo link and bluesky promo link.
Other fannish things I've been up to here and there:
- I made a neocities site where I made a fangirl's cv.and migrated my Untamed guide to. I started an Ateez one as well but it isn't finished and I haven't touched it in a couple months.
- the duckling watchalong group is going into its fifth year somehow. We've watched the Untamed I think a total of 4 or 5 times? Bringing new folks into it each time. We're rolling like a katamari ball and still going strong. Maybe a dozen folks on zoom every week. But we've only just moved into watching Word of Honor, and this'll be the longest single series we've committed to in between Untamed watches at 36 episodes. (The Untamed is 50 eps so that alone takes half a year.)
- I'm also in another less regular watchalong group that's also been going since 2020. Since before the duckling watch started actually (the joke was that I'm the mama duck leading people through the Untamed, hence duckling watch), and it's only a handful of us. I think 6? But we usually can't meet more than once a month unfortunately. But it's a good group. We've watched Supernatural (with a watch guide), Stranger Things, Squid Game, and now Star Trek TOS. At this point it's unclear if we're only sticking to S-names for fun or for real.
- I recently volunteered as a subtitle timer and encoder for a subtitle project, which I'm pretty excited about. I only just joined the discord server for organizing it tonight and have just downloaded the raws.
- I'm mostly on discord and bluesky these days, and I'm headlong into a kpop group (Ateez). It's a funny thing to think about that I wasn't into them at all really when I last posted, but I've been in Ateez fandom for a couple years now and have spent...thousands of dollars at this point. On albums, merch, and going to concerts. I've managed to see them six times, five times at their solo concerts (DC, LA x2, Chicago x2 summer 2024).
The other day, Anarfea DMed me on my personal instagram (I have a fandom one I'm on a lot more) because she had a dream about me and she wanted to know how I was, if I was going to 221b con. That's the plan, and so far this year was still meant to be the last one. We're all hoping it's not, and hoping something else will fill its void if it does go under. It's only a few weeks away, and the plane disasters as of late have been making me wary about traveling. It feels selfish to want to go. But I think I've treated a lot of fandom community things in the last couple years as important to go, because we don't know when we'll be able to go again. Will that comfort my kids if I die in a plane crash though? I doubt it.
My thoughts are all over the place, I suppose. Just in general. I think anyone reading this will be unsurprised to learn that my weekly therapy sessions are like this, slippery and wandering. Most recently, there's been a lot of sleep deprivation involved. A sleep schedule that's so properly fucked that I'm awake at 5 and 6am most days. And this past weekend I still had to be up at 8 or 9 or 10am. I've not been sleeping for longer than 3-4 hour stretches for several days now. It's hard to tell what's ADHD from the inside-out and what's sleep deprivation from the outside-in, making me only about half as functional as I could be. My memory is pretty shot, and I can't tell if that's mommy brain or not, but I seem to recall having a poor memory from before I had the kids. It's not easy to tease apart any of it, it's all just sort of. Soup.
Even before the inauguration, I was having a really terrible 2025. The month of January lasted approximately seven years. I had the flu (the whole family did, in phases), I had a terrible incident with a completely off-his-face drunk Marc, I had jury duty while I had the flu, and got a $95 ticket that I still haven't paid for parking in a truck loading zone. But originally. Originally, at the end of December / early January, I had this idea that I wanted to do some things for myself. On something of a schedule even. Something as close to a new year's resolution as I've ever made, as I'm terrible with those.
- daily: language lesson. Lots to choose from but ASL, Chinese, Korean, Spanish, Japanese.
- weekly: 1) write and 2) stretch/exercise. Ideally more like 2-4x per week, but I didn't make a schedule between daily and weekly.
- monthly: finish a piece of art or craft. Anything, like art or podfic or fic or a bracelet. Whatever
- quarterly: publish something to ao3. "Feels like a stretch goal" is what I wrote about that to in the journal.
